Here we are at the beginning of 2012!
Guillame has been sick on and off this past week. All of us had colds going in to Christmas - I had lost my voice - but Gui's been throwing up sort of randomly once or twice a day. Other than that, he's been happy and there's no fever, so I'm not quite sure what to think. It's been suggested that it might be some kind of post nasal drip thing upsetting his stomach. In any case, he didn't throw up yesterday so we're hoping he's well enough to enjoy the family gift exchange with my sibs today, and to get to enjoy at the rest of the week he has of vacation before returning to school on the 9th.
What I need to make sure to praise him for is how good he's been about being sick and missing out on things because of it. He missed the Wynands family party this last week because he threw up that morning, missed out on staying up for New Years, and has spent a lot of time in his room recuperating after each session of pukage. But he hasn't thrown a fit or had temper or even whined very much about any of it. He's obviously unhappy to be sick on his vacation, but he's really handling his disappointment well, better than I would have expected, and I'm very proud of what a great kid he is growing into.
Pascal was sick a couple times right before Christmas, but it didn't last, and he's mostly his normal, happy self. It's easier to be patient when he is cranky, willful, and temperamental, because I can remember Gui at the same age and I know that some of these things are just functions of being three and wanting to exert some control over his world. Maybe I'm growing up a little too, because Gui tells me that he likes that I don't lose my temper so much anymore! In any case, Pascal swings between being sweet and cuddly and being somewhat tyrannical, and I avoid giving in to the tyrannical too often. This means I spend a lot of time patiently repeating his options to him over and over again while he demands something he can't have, until he finally collapses into cuddles and then relents. It's time consuming, but a lot less emotionally draining then letting every little thing turn into a power struggle with threats and time outs.
Both boys have amused me by becoming paper fiends. There is a huge amount of scrap paper here that they can play with, so I can let them doodle to their heart's delight. Gui gets a lot of writing practice making up directions and drawings for video game plans, and Pascal's drawings are starting to look like something - I am particularly fond of a drawing of a boat that looks quite boat-like!
Aetheline Rose is the sweetheart of the entire family. By far her favorite person in the world (when she's not hungry) is her Oma, who is always happy to sit and 'talk' with her. Aetheline is very social and loves to be held, carried around to see things, and talked to. Her range of conversational noises continues to grow, and it's funny how she uses them to communicate - she has happy noises, scared/sad noises for when something startles her, hello noises for getting someone's attention, complaining noises for when she is uncomfortable or tired. She's not a baby who spends much time crying at all, since she's discovered how to just 'bah! bah mumum bah!' her way into a diaper change or feeding.
Every week that goes by I learn to be more grateful for and appreciative of the individual people my children are. I'm learning to give them room to grow, room to make their own choices and experience the consequences, routines and boundaries to give them clear times and places to be silly and rambunctious and clear times and places to practice self-control. I'm grateful that we have a good place to be, with space for each of us - I never, ever want to live in a shotgun house again, it is amazing what a difference hallways and personal space can make! Gui especially loves having his own room that no one else needs to be in when he needs time and space to think or calm down. I love that I don't have to enforce boundaries with the force of my will alone, but have walls, doors, routines, and shared public space to keep us all on an even keel.
I am grateful for my family, who make it possible for me to take moments to myself throughout the day. It's easy to find a baby-holder upstairs, and not much harder to find someone to just keep an eye or ear on the boys when I am busy. I'm not much of a multi-tasker, I don't think I ever was, so it is comforting to be able to concentrate and get things done without worrying that the kids will be neglected or cause chaos while my attention is diverted.
I have a feeling these will be themes of our New Year - boundaries of space and time, and learning to work within everyone's individual free will, the boundaries of responsibility and autonomy. 2012 promises to be another challenging year of changes and adjustment, but I hope it will land us in a better place, better able to love and enjoy each other.
Happy New Year everybody!
